This wasn't the kind of day for a typical run on the beach. It was pretty cloudy, misty and not exactly a sunrise as my list mentioned I would do but my heart was heavy. I needed some new scenery on my run and I needed to do something that would help me appreciate the moment. Little moments.
You see, Saturday, December 16 was the day after one of the most crippling days in America. On Friday, December 15 a 20 year old shot and killed 26 innocent lives at Sandy Hook Elementary School. 20 of these lives were children under the age of 7 and it brings tears to my eyes at the thought that there are 20 less children that fill the world with joy this morning. My heart was heavy. Is still heavy. So I ran on a less than perfect day and had a less than perfect run on a toiled and tossled beach simply because I could and someone prevented these 20 children from being able to have the same moment of fulfilling milestones on their life list.
It was my first time running on the beach and all these years in Miami and Wilmington of seeing others do it never gave me any indication that it would be quite the experience on my calf muscles. What I quickly learned is that every step you take during a beach run, you are learning how to balance over and over again on an ever changing foundation. The sand is never completely level. Even if it seems as though it is, you are probably sinking into to the sand while you run attempting to relift your body weight to make the next step. After a while, I began to wonder... why in the world would anyone do this to themselves? I mean like really. I can tell you this. I probably won't be doing that again but it's great to say I did.
Needless to say, my run was pretty difficult. I relied on the Beyonce Pandora station as I often do for some extra motivation. Crossing my fingers that "Girls Run the World" will come on when I need it most and it would add some pep to my step. In all honesty, I don't remember if the song ever came on because I was definitely caught up in my thoughts. As I ran pier to pier, I couldn't help but relate the run back to the journey of life. Deep. I know. What's new?
What was simply #8 on my 30 before 30 list actually became a life lesson as I'm sure each item on my list will become. Each day I wake up and it's a move from point A to point B. In the beginning, point B seems so far away but with each step you take you try to remind yourself that the reality is that it is getting closer. As I ran from pier to pier, there were times when the pier I was running to seemed like it kept moving farther away and other times when it would just surprise me because it was so close. The same pier that never moved could motivate me because I percieved it to get closer and distress me when I percieved it wasn't getting close enough. I had to remind myself that Point B never moved and after a while, my run was about the journey. It was about being able to hear the crashing waves and see the different shells that would provide some stabilization under the soles of my feet ever so often.
I tend to be the person who has to consciously remind myself to appreciate the moment. Appreciate the journey. The little things in life. It's the little things in the life that make this life what it is. Who we are at point b means more than actually arriving. Who we are at point b is manifested from the journey we took to get there - the crashing waves that we heard, the different levels of difficulty as we took each step further, the foundation we found when we most needed it. It's not just about your destination or where you want to be.
There are children who will no longer wait for Santa, finger paint portraits for the fridge, lose a tooth or spend another night with a parent or siblings listening to a bedtime story. They have left a void that may never be replaced but also an unforgettable reminder to remember the little things. They have left us with a reminder to focus on the journey and not what the next pier in life may hold. I can't help but take the time to appreciate what really matters and not get caught up with the petty things that life brings here and there. The reality is that we may have no idea what point b really is as we run towards it or who we will be when we get there. The best we can do is make each step to that destination memorable and meaningful.
May each of the families who are grieving this morning find peace in due time.
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