March 20, 2012 - I was offered a new job as an Academic Advisor and happily accepted it as a great stepping stone for me to pursue my career on the academic side of higher education. I also accepted it because I knew it would be a great lifestyle change. Brad and I had been talking about taking our relationship to another level and I had been more than exhausted with the lifestyle that the RC position had expected of me. If I was going to step into the role of a wife, I didn't want to be distracted and consumed with my work. I wanted to be Brad's foundation and stability. I wanted to be there to listen to his woes and troubles from his day when we got home. I wanted to not stress over not being the best I can be at home because I was so focused on being a good boss, mentor, team player, etc.
In no time after starting the position, I felt like I was able to appreciate life a bit more. I keep in touch with my best friends more often. I've joined a book club. Picked up some fun hobbies like making cards, hosting girls' nights, cooking more (than I did before but I still have more work to do), blogging more and reading more books for fun! I've also had the pleasure of making some pretty awesome friends. Between "The Working Girls" Gina, Carly, Maggie, Tams, Sara and Steph, I am always thoroughly entertained amidst the hard work we do on a regular basis. I've also been lucky to work with some really driven and inspiring people like Ginny, Shelly, Reed and Jenny. I certainly can say that I love my job. It definitely has played a role in becoming a better me.
April 21, 2012 - The day it all went down. Brad proposed and I said yes and the journey of our lives continued on a new level of love, joy and happiness. Our engagement was perfect for us. I love that Jenn (Hoff) encouraged me to make sure that I write it all down the day it happened because like any other time capsule submission, I can't wait to show our kids or just read it over any given moment. From the day we met, Brad to me has always been so awesome. He's truly been my best friend who I've shared everything and anything with almost to a fault. He has been someone who has challenged me to be better with the best balance of encouragement when I've doubted myself or beat myself up about things. With the perfect ring, he asked me to stick around... for life. I couldn't have asked for a better companion in life. Not even the puppy I continue to ask for would compete with my love for Mr. Davis. Many people, or just Jojo, like to say that our wedding was planned two weeks later and to some extent the big things were taken care of already to prepare for the next big event...
May 26, 2012 - The day we got married... for the first time around. I've talked about this before with the handful of people we know but I'll say it again. If we had to go back in time and do this all over again, I would make the same decision to get married in a small intimate wedding before the big lavish one later on. I will forever remember the day Brad stood at the foot of my bed shortly after we set our wedding date for May 26, 2013 and said, "You got the earlier wedding date you wanted, so now I'm putting my foot down on saying we need to go ahead and get married this year." We had always talked about what me starting a new job would mean for us. Would I live off campus to move back on in a year? Should we save money and get married earlier? So the decision was made. Brad put his foot down as the man of the house and said "we're getting married" and that was the best decision ever.
So in 2012, we arranged for our families to meet for the first time and had a small ceremony where we exchanged vows and my parents' wedding bands with our immediate family and best friends in attendance. It was the most special, intimate and cherished memory I think I will ever have. We vowed to love, honor and cherish each other for the rest of our lives in front of the people we always knew would be there to support us. I wore an Old Navy off-white dress, Brad wore a stunning gray suit and we stood at the altar where Brad was baptized with Reverend Diggs, a man who has married all of Brad's married siblings. This day was so unbelievably us. The part of us that is private and family focused. It was meaningful without the flair and it started our marriage on the best foundation surrounded by love and infused with God's presence. Next year, same date, same time, we will do this again and yes, it will be very much us as well. We will technically renew our vows in front of our extended family and friends and celebrate our marriage with most of the people who mean the world to us. We love a bougie life and that's what our marriage celebration will be. This time we will write our vows and I couldn't be more humbled by having the opportunity to express my love to Brad in public with a year of marriage under our belts. Our love continues to grow everyday and in a new way. I'm so blessed.
Needless to say, we've had quite a year. Shortly after we were married, we confirmed that Brad was going to move into a new area which meant that we would move into a new apartment. Our lives have been merged and even though we are waiting for 5/26/13 to make the name change and account switcheroos, I feel like one with my husband. He's amazing and created by God perfectly for our blessed marriage.
So that was last year. This year, there is a whole lot ahead.
- Bachelorette Party in Miami
- Brad's ASCA Conference in St. Pete
- Jack & Jill Shower in Wilmington
- February Weekend in NY
- Advising Conference in Fayetteville
- NASPA Conference in Orlando, FL
- Brad's Best Man Duties for Cotton
- Yoli & Damian's Wedding in New York
- Cotton & Joy's Wedding in Hampton, VA
- Tahirah's Graduation in Lexington, KY
- Ayesha's Graduation in Phoenix, AZ
- Max's Graduation in Virginia
- Sherane & Sheldon's Wedding in New York
- Margaret & Hayden's Wedding
- Allie & Ben's Wedding in Raleigh, NC
- Lily & Eliav's Wedding in Seattle, WA
Take care of me, guilt-free
I'd like to spend more time for grooming and relaxing. I tend to always put myself on the backburner with taking care of my exterior and would like to do a better job of not feeling guilty for going to get my nails done or budgeting for a massage.
Accept people for who they are without rationalizing
I've been spending a lot of time trying to figure out why people do the things they do and how sometimes it just doesn't make sense to me. What a waste of thought process and energy. People are going to be who they are. I should just accept them and not wonder why they act that way. If I don't like it, no one said I had "vacancies" for friends. I kid. I kid.
Less technology, More quiet time
Brad keeps teasing me on this but it's really an effort to rely on less technology. Sometimes there isn't a day that hasn't gone by at home where I'm not letting hours and hours slip away because I'm stuck looking up something online or constantly on my phone or watching tv. I'd like to be able to spend more time reading, cooking, talking, creating or crafting. Sometimes I wonder if this is why my memory is so bad because I'm so constantly in a tech frenzy. I'd like to start by not using my phone or any technology unless it's reading a book after 10pm. If Brad is watching tv then I should just focus on spending quality time with him watching tv but not being distracted by all that's going on my head or on my phone. Hopefully, the 30 before 30 challenge of turning my phone off after 6pm and not using a computer for a week will help me with getting it together.
Signing off to start my year...
Jem :)
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